Everything in this world is so fast paced that I would constantly lose myself along with everything that I am. When one thing starts to fumble, everything would crumble. Delicate balance? Maybe.

I have a dream which turns into an ambition which sets my goals that spur me on. I have a family that needs alot of attentions and commitments which suck up most of my time along with my school work.

Am I lonely? Yes I am. I yearn for your company and wish for your hugs & kisses & your listening ears together with your encouragements. Do you know who you are? Can I afford a relationship? Would you want to? Answer is clear cut, NO, NO & NO. At least I think you do not know and you would not want.

It is time to really shift my focus permanently.

I will work around with the deck i'm dealt with.

Matters of the heart is not important.

Remember the way of life...

I am waiting.

waiting for something.

something like a sign.

a sign to do with the sky.

I am waiting...

...for the fuckin' sky to drop.

Hell.

Grandma is hospitalised again. I really can't bear but what choice do I have? She told me to ask if just stay there 2days would do but it is very obvious she can't. I do not know how and what i can do to let her feel better. Everytime she goes in, I would wish that I can stay with her till she is discharged. We've been neglecting her feelings quite a bit for a rather long while. Where is the patience I had few years back? We all have our own lives to live but my grandma only have us to live for. Is she turning into a depressing old lady? I love her dearly but she would get on my nerves from time to time, even when I knew she done all these so we may live more comfortably. She just couldn't get the point that we want her to rest more and we couldn't get the point that she just want to take care of us.

Right now, she must be either sleeping or longing for home.
It is going to be a long night for me too.

If there is anything I can do, I would. Even if it means shortening my life in exchange for her to not suffer, I would do so without any hesitation.

What is ur value for life?

I just wan to drunk myself in alcohol and work.

sometimes u wish for greatness
other times u wish for simplicity
sometimes u wish for company
other times u wish for loneliness
sometimes u wish for good things to happen
other times u wish for bad things to befall

Humans are funny.
I am funny.
R u funny?

Lunar new year is just tomorrow! WOW! So troublesome can! Because of this, lessons got to be postponed to another later date. How inconvenient. So much work to do as well.
So who does work over new year? Heres one who does.

Am I having gastric or just indigestion?
So so tired!
My appetite hasn't been regular recently,
my sleeping habit is waaay off.
Lessons have been dry as hell.

Sometimes I would wonder if all these are worth for what is installed for my future. Would my mother's worry come true? Or would I realise my dreams and achieve my goals? It's like during a run.

At the start of a run, most people would be so enegetic and filled with hopes of completing the run, starting off with excitement and good pace. Very soon, energy starts to get drained away bit by bit, hopes turn into despair and negative thoughts flood in. Some gives up half way, others struggle with resolves. At the end, not all would be able to finish the run and those who finish the run would come out a new person.

For that belief I so readily hold,
pouring in the greatest asset I hold,
my youth.
I will complete this race even if it takes my whole life.

I do not run away from brick walls.
I CONQUER THEM!

For all the pain you feel, I unknowingly feel them too.

Impossible is solution yet to be found.
Impossible is more time needed.
Impossible is temporary.
Impossible is brick wall.

Life is filled with brick walls. Brick walls are there not to keep people out. They're there for just one reason, for you to show how much you want to attain the thing beyond the wall. So the next time you encounter a brick wall, do give it some thought.

Will you attempt to conquer it?
Will you break the wall?
Will you walk away?


Today is SUPER tiring man!
after reaching home, immediately fall aslp!
sleep sleep sleep den wake up,
now feel like sleeping again.
Should I do homework after I bathe?
Should I sleep after I bathe?
oh man~

pardon my phonetic alphabets in the previous post.
wasn't really feeling very good (mentally)

it is in the past now.
Like the monk who carried the lady across the river, who left that incident after the crossing is done. Leave it behind and move forth.

I found out my cutting skills have degraded!
So has my painting skills.
OH MAN!
haha. doesnt matter.

Convictions and resolves.
GPA <3.5
when impossible becomes nothing,
nothing is impossible.

FOXTROT
UNIFORM
CHARLIE
KILO
INDIA
NOVEMEBER
GOLF

HOTEL
ECHO
LIMA
LIMA

Love doesn't just revolve around boys and girls. I feel people often neglect the fact that there is really more to Love than just BGRs. I remember I just to blog about it before. Love is an endless divine source of magical energy that is hidden in every single person. The amount that one has, depends on how he sees Love. I think that if nowadays young people have time to go into BGRs and break up at the end of the day, we should all concentrate our love on loving everything, including ourselves and the things we hate.

The key to being happy is actually very simple.
Spread your Love to every corner of your life. Don't seek it! Because you can't seek what you already have. You'll find yourself to be a cheerful person and soon infect everyone around you with your positive energy.

There are things I can't let go. Things that I give myself excuses to not let go. I'm still learning to practice what I say, so people who read this and see me getting pissed or upset, pardon me! =)

There is Life & Death everyday.
Life & Death comes together.
With Life, comes Death.
With Death, comes Life.

Since the dawn of humanity, no one has ever had control over Death.

Do you believe in fate?
Do you believe in destiny?
Do you believe what happened, happens for a reason?
Would you put up a brave front and bury your sorrow?
Would you grieve over the deceased and stop moving on?

As much as it hurts, there is nothing anyone could've done. I wish strength for those who lost their love ones. And for those who've yet lost anyone to treasure moments together.

BEYONCE & J.T. on SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE!
SERIOUSLY FUNNY!
ENJOY!

Anger clouds one's mind.
When one's mind is clouded,
his vision becomes poor.
His reasoning skills become poor.
His breathing becomes messy,
frustration builds up.

Nothing, even the most beautiful thing on earth, would be pleasant to his eyes for as long as he is angry. Is it worth the time to get angry?

Learn we must. To be slow towards anger for anger only brings about more anger.

Totally not feeling well these days.
my throat is going against me.
bad weather? insufficient water?
maybe a little of both.

My family have been clearing 9years worth of things for the past few weeks. Found loads of almost forgotten memories. Some look unfamiliar while some made me think back and wonder. Like I've said before, the past is already behind. As much as one wishes, no one can ever change it. But things happened, happen for a reason.

Memory is like a huge vault. For the past few weeks, I've visited some parts of mine that I wouldn't have remembered if I never saw those stuff. They reminded me of what I've done wrong and what I've not done to be right. It's time. I've got what I needed and I should leave the vault and move forth.

School is starting next week. I'm kind of looking forward to the new semester. I'm so going to complain about the work load yet at the same time, these work will definitely take my mind off things I should not be thinking about.

Every year there is a beginning and an end. People would say every year only happen once so every year is special. When everything becomes special, everything becomes normal. The world still moves on and life still goes on.

Once you're able to "let go" and "let be", there would be no need for being depress during festive seasons.

Most importantly..
Rule your life and not let "Life" rule you.