Negative vibes!

Have you ever had the feeling that you cant achieve anything? that "accomplishment" is like the stars while you're standing on solid earth? though you know that there are certain things you knew you needed to do and even though you have the strength to do, you do not have the power to draw out that strength?

i know what i have to do. while waiting for nafa's letter, i should still be drawing and trying my best to get the freelance job. i know that worrying ain't gonna solve anything and that what ever happens, what ever the result is, i would still need to move on and do what i needed to do.

everyday, i take out my sketch books and pencils, i do not dare to draw. i would stare at the blank paper and just space out. after awhile, i take out my PSP and play. after awhile, i open the one piece web page and start watching one piece.

this is a sign of weakness! i'm easily distracted. i gave up w/o doing anything. i did not display my will power nor my determination to do what i knew i need to do. i knew what went wrong yet i stood there and continue to do wrong.

can someone help me? i doubt so. i need to seek my own resolve. fast!