today...
tat familiar face...
so wish i could hold her hands...
if i could hug her for one last time...
i feel a barrier between us...
for once, i feel as if i could die right on the spot...
words reach my mind and into my mouth yet i can't say them out...
I learnt that it's time to truely let go...
why do i still care for her when she doesnt wan me to care for her anymore?
the answer eludes me even till now...
guess... it doesnt really matters anymore rite?

i never knew what is on her mind.
i never knew if i'm doing the right stuff.
all i know that i wan to give her all my love.
never did i know i end up hurting her so much.
it stings. even till this very second, it stings.
much worse then any pain i've felt before.

but now i know is not the time to fool around anymore.
now i know is the time to pave a path for my future.
now i know is the time to prove i exist.
now is the time...

as compared to my mom's era...
i feel so spoilt.
i feel so much more irresponsible.
i feel like i've always been protected even when my mom ain't around me.
i feel her pain when i listen to her story.
i feel this pain tearing thru me so much more den this breakup.
i feel her sorrow and i felt like crying out.

have i really done all i could to live life to the fullest?
do i really need a other half?
when my mom is suffering alone, did she have anyone to turn to?
as a guy, shldn't i be much more stronger den my mom?
did current society really soften the younger generations?
or did the younger generations use this advance world as an excuse to soften themselves?