all my life, for the past 20yrs. i've made so much mistakes and bad judgements and lousy decisions. i always wanted to make amendments and when the time is about right, something will always happen to stop me on my tracks. oprah says that luck is preparation meeting opportunity. so does this mean i'm always out of luck? i've all i need and nvr be able to use them.

when i'm in Sec 2, i choose arts & D&T as my sub. the school den take away these two subjects due to lack of students. i go on to sec 3 and fail badly in my humans & got D7 for both of them in my O's. there goes my opportunity even b4 i got my preparation.

den i went to TP to try to apply for an audition nothing went smooth and i ended up in SP doing something i dread. i lost to material engineering and was out of the institute. again, i've the preparation for the audition yet i lost my opportunity. i had the opportunity in SP for a dip but i've no preparation for the course.

den i went on into NS w/o wasting much time. i was selected to be a part of the commandos. i had the opportunity yet i'd no preparation for my knees gave in.

now, i was happily in a relationship. being the most happy guy in my own world. noeing that how fucked up i was in my first relationship, i looked forward to making changes and work things out wif my gf as we go along. i had all the preparations on my side but i still lost cuz i did not take into consideration of my other half. i'm so focus on setting off right and treasuring (or shld i say owning) her that now its kinda messy.

if there is someone up there watching over people, would u please give some attention to us and help us set tings straight again? if all tat is happening now in my life is a test for me, can u please give me a sign as to when the test will end? or if this is an idea of a sick joke, y dont u try running a car thru me? its nice to see me splatter u noe?